Bad habits, old ways?
What’s going on? Why did being there make me feel so ..lost? I went there to regain some of the faith I’ve lost, but in return I’ve found myself more lost than ever, and so empty handed. When things came down to the worse, it was always my place to find strength and to let go of all the things bringing me down. But why did it feel like it just added more weight on my shoulders? I guess you can say .. I just wasn’t feelin’ it. What happened to the worship? I heard giggles in my ears after pouring out my heart. So what if I can’t sing? Atleast I’m giving my all. That’s the problem with some people, they’re too afraid of what others think to give their 100%. Worship is 2x prayer, and if their resolution was to pray more, THEN WHY weren’t they? I guess after being disrespected like that, I bounced. I felt so frustrated, and angry. It may be a new year, but some people just can’t erase their past. “Clean slate,” just doesn’t happen for me. I just can’t let go, and I don’t think I ever will. I’ve accepted everything, but that doesn’t mean I can forget about it just like that. I wish more people understood me. I just don’t feel like being in the presence of those who do nothing about talk about changing when they do the exact opposite. I guess right now, I just want to …. take some space and just focus on myself alittle more. Just want to take a little breather from everybody. I just want to be left alone …
Leaving in 2 weeks, omgggggg
